Run. Dog. Cat. Cat. Me.

Everything you need to know about running and life and any other random crap I find bouncing through my mind like a ping pong ball. And always be sure your shoes are happy.

Exercise and the Exorcist – Part 1

As you both know, I have Butt Falling Off Syndrome (https://rundogcat.me/2012/02/05/do-you-have-any-spare-change-i-can-have/ in case you forgot).

I forget stuff all the time so I assume you might also.  For instance, right now I cannot remember where my phone is.  I could call it but I keep the sound turned off.  I do this because otherwise I keep getting little pinging noises all the time because I get lots of important emails in my important position as a secretary.  Or it could be FB updates.  Anyway, I could figure out how to turn that pinging off and set the phone to ring only when someone calls but I just haven’t gotten to that yet.  I mean, I’ve only had the phone for four months.  I’m busy.  So you see that I could try calling the phone to find it, but I won’t be able to hear it ring.  And that’s why I can totally understand if people forget stuff.

But anyway (HAHAHA BUTT anyway)  I was talking about my Butt Falling Off Syndrome which I have.  After the sad run in the not sunny not warm day a couple weeks ago I made an appointment to see The Exorcist, aka “Kelly S”.

To anyone else The Exorcist looks like a very pretty petite redhead.  She looks like that to me too, when I first enter her chambers.

Hi, I’m Kelly.  Don’t I look sweet and nice?

But this is what she is thinking:

The sad part is, I continue to return.  That’s how much I want to be able to run.  I will endure pain so I can endure pain.

(Think about that.)

(Seriously.  Think about that.)

(Are you thinking about that?)

(If you’re a runner you didn’t even need to think about that, did you?)

The Exorcist is kind of like all those movies that you don’t really watch all the way through because the Drug Lord is slowly breaking the undercover cop inch-by-inch.

Nice, Nice.  You enter her chambers.  Yanni is humming or whatever he does that makes you feel all calm and zen and united with the universe.  Muted lighting.  Soft warm colors.  Pillow.  Comfy.

She lightly kneads your back and shoulders.  “Hummm.  Hummmm” she says.

*sigh*  *relaxing*

“Well what the h3ll did you do?  Fall down a flight of stairs?” she queries.

“Um. No.  Just running.  You know, runnin’ runnin'”

“Well, your butt is on sideways.”

“WTH?”

“Crooked.  Your butt is on sideways.”

OMG.  I always suspected.  I’m half-assed.

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2 thoughts on “Exercise and the Exorcist – Part 1

  1. Pingback: Jillian Michaels: Pace Buster! | Middle-Aged Woman (newly) On The Run!

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